I turn the Armor Knight guarding the Sage with Heal Field ready inside out. The Armor Knight splits into five tiny Armor Knights. One is yellow and laughs a lot, one is blue and cries a lot, one is red and yells a lot, one is green and sticks out his tongue a lot, and one is purple and screams a lot. I then kick a puppy right in front of the blue Armor Knight. He cries so much the battlefield is flooded with salty tears. Salty, salty, metal-rusting tears. The Armor Knights are all rusted into place. The yellow Armor Knight thinks that this is funny, and laughs, and just happens to be laughing at some French guy on an orange horse, and is killed in the resulting duel. The green Armor Knight sticks his tongue out and squirms, because he thinks rust is nasty. The green Armor Knight's helmet collapses, and the rusty metal scrapes all over his tongue, giving him tetanus. The red Armor Knight is angry at the blue Armor Knight, and starts yelling at him. A red Celtic high-melanin monoculus comes over, says "Ye can't kill blues by yellin' at em, lad! This is how ye do it! Ha ha ha!", and then fires some spiky bombs at the blue Armor Knight and blows him up. Then a blue Baden-Württemberg man clad in surgical scrubs and a proton pack yells, "Armor knight is dead!", runs into a nearby blue building, and comes back out firing the proton pack into a very fat Cyrillic man with a big gatling gun, who roars furiously and fills the red Armor Knight with boolets. The purple Armor Knight is scared out of his wits and screams so hard he falls over into the water face first. He then gets so scared of the water he screams so hard that it bounces him out of the water backwards and into a nearby ravine full of lava. The purple Armor Knight is so scared that he screams so hard that the sheer force of the scream propels him upwards into the stratosphere, and he bounces off a Russian spy satellite and plummets to the ground. He then screams so hard that a passing airplane pilot hears the scream, believes it to be the scream of an enemy plane, and rams the purple Armor Knight with his biplane propellers, shredding him harder than a heavy metal solo. Suddenly, all five mangled corpses (or corpse bits) of the different Armor Knights glow with an eerie light, and the partial souls of each one rise into the air and reform back into one, very traumatized Armor Knight. Then the Armor Knight is immediately unreformed back again, thanks to my chopping shears.
Black hole is revealed to be a simulation on a computer. The sheer processing power needed to compute and render a black hole causes the computer to melt, destroying the black hole (simulation).
I slap the freeze dispenser in a freezer. The dispenser is already frozen, and having it become even colder causes the dispenser to roll over and gain infinite heat, which makes it explode violently into a mist of subatomic particles.
Of course, the resulting shockwave of infinite energy spreads across the universe, which means that particles have the same probability of being in the Amazon, in Warsaw, or in Omicron Persei 8, thus turning the universe into a slurry of barely-matter bits. However, this is all just in Minecraft, and I focus all the devastation onto the part of TIW's server running and rendering the freeze dispenser, causing it to melt down and the freeze dispenser to lag briefly and then disappear.
I slap the Pyro's Neon Annihilator into the water. It mutters in horror and jumps into the river to get its beloved axe back. It then forgets that the Neon Annihilator was still charged, and the river is full of electricity-conducting salt water.
2/?
Chlorine Chlorry [F]: 15000/15000 HP (releases clouds of chlorine) (clouds are a hazard that entities can push each other into for heavy corrosive damage) (clouds dissipate after 2 updates)
Chlorine Chlorry Chlourier x3 [SCP-F]: 1000/1000 HP (riding Chlorine Chlorry) (immune to chlorine) (can throw Chlorry-created clouds of chlorine at enemies, destroying the clouds but causing poisoning)
I smack a reverse Fan of War on Tazz and mark him for life. As in, the opposite of marking him for death. It causes him to take anti-minicrits, which is 35% damage resistance.
It turns out that the reverse Fan of War also marks for life, in the sense that Tazz now has a big scar on his face that he can't get rid of. However, the enemies are cowed by this impressive scar, and decide that they would better off be holding their punches.
Runner Runner
Owner: ka_doink1234o0
Health: 6,000 / 6,000
Shields: 2,500 / 2,500
Ammo: 35 / 35
Attacks:
Stun Gun [0 damage | 3 ammo | Effects: Stun (Stuns the target for the next 3 red posts)]
Digitalis Cannon [100 damage | 4 ammo | Effects: Digitalis Soaked (Applies the Digitantalized and Digitangled curse for two updates)]
Spawn Runner [0 damage | 10 ammo | Effects: Runner Dropper (Applies 1 Runner to target)]
Spawn Heavy Runner [250 damage | 25 ammo | Effects: Runner Dropper (Applies 1 Heavy Runner to target)]
Spawn Gunner Runner [0 damage | 15 ammo | Effects: Runner Dropper (Applies 1 Gunner Runner to target)]
Boosts: Runnerproofing (Runners will never attack this vehicle) Heavy Armor (Attacks targeted at this vehicle deal 75% damage after shielding is calculated) Matter Processor (Regenerates 0.5 ammo every post)
Curses: Digitantalized (Runners can be applied to this vehicle) Digitangled (Attacks targeted at this vehicle always hit)
Runner
Owner: ka_doink1234o0
Attached to: None
Health: 500 / 500
Attacks:
Stun Gun [0 damage | ∞ ammo | Effects: Stun (Stuns the target for the next 3 red posts) Cooldown (Can only be fired once an update)]
Boosts: Automated (Attacks at the beginning of the turn automatically) Quick (Attacks targeted to this vehicle have a 50% chance of hitting)
Curses: Attached (Can only attack the target it was applied to) Digitalis Support (Dies if Digitantalized is removed or attached vehicle dies)
Heavy Runner
Owner: ka_doink1234o0
Attached to: None
Health: 1,000 / 1,000
Attacks:
Stun Gun [0 damage | ∞ ammo | Effects: Stun (Stuns the target for the next 3 red posts) Cooldown (Can only be fired once an update)]
Boosts: Automated (Attacks at the beginning of the turn automatically) Heavy (Attacks targeted at the attached target will always hit)
Curses: Attached (Can only attack the target it was applied to) Digitalis Support (Dies if Digitantalized is removed or attached vehicle dies)
Gunner Runner
Owner: ka_doink1234o0
Attached to: None
Health: 1,000 / 1,000
Attacks:
Run Gun [400 damage | ∞ ammo | Effects: Cooldown (Can only be fired once an update)]
Boosts: Automated (Attacks at the beginning of the turn automatically)
Curses: Attached (Can only attack the target it was applied to) Digitalis Support (Dies if Digitantalized is removed or attached vehicle dies)
I evacuate the remaining Lunar-1 Personnel to the nearest Foundation safe place, and start to build a Chlorine Chlorry.
1/?
Chlorine Chlorry [F]: 15000/15000 HP (releases clouds of chlorine) (clouds are a hazard that entities can push each other into for heavy corrosive damage) (clouds dissipate after 2 updates)
Chlorine Chlorry Chlourier x3 [SCP-F]: 1000/1000 HP (riding Chlorine Chlorry) (immune to chlorine) (can throw Chlorry-created clouds of chlorine at enemies, destroying the clouds but causing poisoning)
0
I turn the Armor Knight guarding the Sage with Heal Field ready inside out. The Armor Knight splits into five tiny Armor Knights. One is yellow and laughs a lot, one is blue and cries a lot, one is red and yells a lot, one is green and sticks out his tongue a lot, and one is purple and screams a lot. I then kick a puppy right in front of the blue Armor Knight. He cries so much the battlefield is flooded with salty tears. Salty, salty, metal-rusting tears. The Armor Knights are all rusted into place. The yellow Armor Knight thinks that this is funny, and laughs, and just happens to be laughing at some French guy on an orange horse, and is killed in the resulting duel. The green Armor Knight sticks his tongue out and squirms, because he thinks rust is nasty. The green Armor Knight's helmet collapses, and the rusty metal scrapes all over his tongue, giving him tetanus. The red Armor Knight is angry at the blue Armor Knight, and starts yelling at him. A red Celtic high-melanin monoculus comes over, says "Ye can't kill blues by yellin' at em, lad! This is how ye do it! Ha ha ha!", and then fires some spiky bombs at the blue Armor Knight and blows him up. Then a blue Baden-Württemberg man clad in surgical scrubs and a proton pack yells, "Armor knight is dead!", runs into a nearby blue building, and comes back out firing the proton pack into a very fat Cyrillic man with a big gatling gun, who roars furiously and fills the red Armor Knight with boolets. The purple Armor Knight is scared out of his wits and screams so hard he falls over into the water face first. He then gets so scared of the water he screams so hard that it bounces him out of the water backwards and into a nearby ravine full of lava. The purple Armor Knight is so scared that he screams so hard that the sheer force of the scream propels him upwards into the stratosphere, and he bounces off a Russian spy satellite and plummets to the ground. He then screams so hard that a passing airplane pilot hears the scream, believes it to be the scream of an enemy plane, and rams the purple Armor Knight with his biplane propellers, shredding him harder than a heavy metal solo. Suddenly, all five mangled corpses (or corpse bits) of the different Armor Knights glow with an eerie light, and the partial souls of each one rise into the air and reform back into one, very traumatized Armor Knight. Then the Armor Knight is immediately unreformed back again, thanks to my chopping shears.
0
I command Sharpedo from beyond the grave to Earthquake the Spy in revenge.
0
I take the meatball to a bowling alley, jam the ball return machine, and then bowl with the meatball.
0
Pull some fighters from the forward base and join the fight against the dual-strike squad.
0
I start dancing in the Kazotsky Mob.
0
Black hole is revealed to be a simulation on a computer. The sheer processing power needed to compute and render a black hole causes the computer to melt, destroying the black hole (simulation).
0
I whirl around to Sharpedo and smash a Jarate right at the elite spy's gut.
0
I slap the freeze dispenser in a freezer. The dispenser is already frozen, and having it become even colder causes the dispenser to roll over and gain infinite heat, which makes it explode violently into a mist of subatomic particles.
Of course, the resulting shockwave of infinite energy spreads across the universe, which means that particles have the same probability of being in the Amazon, in Warsaw, or in Omicron Persei 8, thus turning the universe into a slurry of barely-matter bits. However, this is all just in Minecraft, and I focus all the devastation onto the part of TIW's server running and rendering the freeze dispenser, causing it to melt down and the freeze dispenser to lag briefly and then disappear.
0
I slap the Pyro's Neon Annihilator into the water. It mutters in horror and jumps into the river to get its beloved axe back. It then forgets that the Neon Annihilator was still charged, and the river is full of electricity-conducting salt water.
0
2/?
Chlorine Chlorry [F]: 15000/15000 HP (releases clouds of chlorine) (clouds are a hazard that entities can push each other into for heavy corrosive damage) (clouds dissipate after 2 updates)
Chlorine Chlorry Chlourier x3 [SCP-F]: 1000/1000 HP (riding Chlorine Chlorry) (immune to chlorine) (can throw Chlorry-created clouds of chlorine at enemies, destroying the clouds but causing poisoning)
0
A massive Steve is zombified by a zombie and then its textures and code are deleted by Mojang.
0
I fire the Runner Runner's Digitalis Cannon and Spawn Runner at the Tank.
0
I smack a reverse Fan of War on Tazz and mark him for life. As in, the opposite of marking him for death. It causes him to take anti-minicrits, which is 35% damage resistance.
It turns out that the reverse Fan of War also marks for life, in the sense that Tazz now has a big scar on his face that he can't get rid of. However, the enemies are cowed by this impressive scar, and decide that they would better off be holding their punches.
0
I help Ampulugator with his Oil Rig. 5/?
I also finish the Runner Runner.
0/25 Round End Protector
35/35 Runner Runner
Owner: ka_doink1234o0
Health: 6,000 / 6,000
Shields: 2,500 / 2,500
Ammo: 35 / 35
Attacks:
Stun Gun [0 damage | 3 ammo | Effects: Stun (Stuns the target for the next 3 red posts)]
Digitalis Cannon [100 damage | 4 ammo | Effects: Digitalis Soaked (Applies the Digitantalized and Digitangled curse for two updates)]
Spawn Runner [0 damage | 10 ammo | Effects: Runner Dropper (Applies 1 Runner to target)]
Spawn Heavy Runner [250 damage | 25 ammo | Effects: Runner Dropper (Applies 1 Heavy Runner to target)]
Spawn Gunner Runner [0 damage | 15 ammo | Effects: Runner Dropper (Applies 1 Gunner Runner to target)]
Boosts: Runnerproofing (Runners will never attack this vehicle) Heavy Armor (Attacks targeted at this vehicle deal 75% damage after shielding is calculated) Matter Processor (Regenerates 0.5 ammo every post)
Curses: Digitantalized (Runners can be applied to this vehicle) Digitangled (Attacks targeted at this vehicle always hit)
Runner
Owner: ka_doink1234o0
Attached to: None
Health: 500 / 500
Attacks:
Stun Gun [0 damage | ∞ ammo | Effects: Stun (Stuns the target for the next 3 red posts) Cooldown (Can only be fired once an update)]
Boosts: Automated (Attacks at the beginning of the turn automatically) Quick (Attacks targeted to this vehicle have a 50% chance of hitting)
Curses: Attached (Can only attack the target it was applied to) Digitalis Support (Dies if Digitantalized is removed or attached vehicle dies)
Heavy Runner
Owner: ka_doink1234o0
Attached to: None
Health: 1,000 / 1,000
Attacks:
Stun Gun [0 damage | ∞ ammo | Effects: Stun (Stuns the target for the next 3 red posts) Cooldown (Can only be fired once an update)]
Boosts: Automated (Attacks at the beginning of the turn automatically) Heavy (Attacks targeted at the attached target will always hit)
Curses: Attached (Can only attack the target it was applied to) Digitalis Support (Dies if Digitantalized is removed or attached vehicle dies)
Gunner Runner
Owner: ka_doink1234o0
Attached to: None
Health: 1,000 / 1,000
Attacks:
Run Gun [400 damage | ∞ ammo | Effects: Cooldown (Can only be fired once an update)]
Boosts: Automated (Attacks at the beginning of the turn automatically)
Curses: Attached (Can only attack the target it was applied to) Digitalis Support (Dies if Digitantalized is removed or attached vehicle dies)
0
I evacuate the remaining Lunar-1 Personnel to the nearest Foundation safe place, and start to build a Chlorine Chlorry.
1/?
Chlorine Chlorry [F]: 15000/15000 HP (releases clouds of chlorine) (clouds are a hazard that entities can push each other into for heavy corrosive damage) (clouds dissipate after 2 updates)
Chlorine Chlorry Chlourier x3 [SCP-F]: 1000/1000 HP (riding Chlorine Chlorry) (immune to chlorine) (can throw Chlorry-created clouds of chlorine at enemies, destroying the clouds but causing poisoning)