I don't appreciate you using something so similar to my title... Perhaps, change it to Endermen, or EnderDragon, or The End Dimension, or just SOMETHING different?
Also, don't say anything about you having the title first, becuase my book was posted elsewhere a WHILE back. The post in the literature section was pretty much a repost.
By far, it was okay. I've read through all 9 chapters.
The first few chapters caught my interest.. then it slowly fades away as I venture further. And before I knew it, I was skipping paragraphs and has little ideas at how the story is advancing.
Simply saying, the story is uh.. a bit dull. Keep it up though. Do better.
I don't appreciate you using something so similar to my title... Perhaps, change it to Endermen, or EnderDragon, or The End Dimension, or just SOMETHING different?
Also, don't say anything about you having the title first, becuase my book was posted elsewhere a WHILE back. The post in the literature section was pretty much a repost.
On another note, nice work! You're a good writer!
I did start my topic a year before you did. I had the topic in the old fan art section, so I'm kinda confused. Explain?
From what I read so far, this story is NOT different, from what I expected. The storyline so far is a bit generic, the Endermen are evil and the Enderdragon is awakening etc. If this story would be different, then : why not make the endermen the good guys (for once), or something like that.
So, my rant has ended, time for constructive criticism.
The story idea, is not that bad, just a bit... rushed in my opinion. The story goes into a kind of blurr in the later Chapters.
Thinking about this my review i came to the conclusion that my view probably is invalid, as i never wrote a fanfic or story longer than 4 pages.
So who am I to judge you...
I hope this helps you write even better stories. ����
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Would you like to know the atomic structure of a piece of bread?
From what I read so far, this story is NOT different, from what I expected. The storyline so far is a bit generic, the Endermen are evil and the Enderdragon is awakening etc. If this story would be different, then : why not make the endermen the good guys (for once), or something like that.
So, my rant has ended, time for constructive criticism.
The story idea, is not that bad, just a bit... rushed in my opinion. The story goes into a kind of blurr in the later Chapters.
Thinking about this my review i came to the conclusion that my view probably is invalid, as i never wrote a fanfic or story longer than 4 pages.
So who am I to judge you...
I hope this helps you write even better stories. ������
Yeah, this was back when endermen weren't talked about as much as they are now. The concept I had introduced was like cocaine to the 70s. You get the idea. It's partially why I've given up.
Thanks anyways!
-TBL
We don't have the dedication, unfortunately. Also, I don't seem to have dedication xD
I am working on a new chapter though. just wait!
http://www.minecraftforum.net/topic/1672537-the-ravine-a-story-in-which-nobody-survives-chapter-1-now-out/#entry20690277
Also, don't say anything about you having the title first, becuase my book was posted elsewhere a WHILE back. The post in the literature section was pretty much a repost.
On another note, nice work! You're a good writer!
The first few chapters caught my interest.. then it slowly fades away as I venture further. And before I knew it, I was skipping paragraphs and has little ideas at how the story is advancing.
Simply saying, the story is uh.. a bit dull. Keep it up though. Do better.
I did start my topic a year before you did. I had the topic in the old fan art section, so I'm kinda confused. Explain?
http://www.minecraftforum.net/topic/1672537-the-ravine-a-story-in-which-nobody-survives-chapter-1-now-out/#entry20690277
So, my rant has ended, time for constructive criticism.
The story idea, is not that bad, just a bit... rushed in my opinion. The story goes into a kind of blurr in the later Chapters.
Thinking about this my review i came to the conclusion that my view probably is invalid, as i never wrote a fanfic or story longer than 4 pages.
So who am I to judge you...
I hope this helps you write even better stories. ����
TT2000, you are genius.
Yeah, this was back when endermen weren't talked about as much as they are now. The concept I had introduced was like cocaine to the 70s. You get the idea. It's partially why I've given up.
Thanks anyways!
-TBL
http://www.minecraftforum.net/topic/1672537-the-ravine-a-story-in-which-nobody-survives-chapter-1-now-out/#entry20690277