I'm currently in a relationship and I've hit a bump in the road.
Some backstory:
She's kind of insecure (like some girls I've dated in the past) and so I try to remind her that she's pretty, smart, skillful, etc. Of course I don't say it in vain, I do mean it when I say it but I'm afraid it contributes to a bigger problem. Saying I'm trying to help ease her insecurity would be a poor excuse, and to tell the truth I'm just really attracted to her. Since I enjoy being around her so much and love talking to her in return I give her a lot of attention. This includes helping her with emotional and life problems.
Today hasn't been fun for me. I woke up late and anxious and I got tired pretty quickly throughout the day. I started to get a headache after playing Killing Floor so I decided to try and calm down and drink some water. Relaxing took about 30 minutes I guess. In the meantime I was in a skype call with her and wasn't saying much because she wasn't either. I decided that maybe getting some fresh air would help alleviate my headache, just getting some sun y'know?
I came back in about 15 minutes and asked if I could join her TF2 game and so I did. She spent the most time and attention I've ever seen on me, even though I was only gone for about half an hour (15 mins physically, 15 probably mentally lol). She's gone for plenty of time before without me, what made now different?
So I questioned her about it. She said she just missed me, which really ticked off the little suspicious and paranoid time-bomb in me. I thought that she only liked my attention, not actually me. She would only talk to me when she wanted the attention, never spending time with me when or thinking about it. She says she forgot. She's BEEN saying that the past few days, "Oh I'm sorry, I forgot we were supposed to play together" or some crap like "I wasn't thinking about it, sorry." I feel like I'm being used.
Then we got into an argument about it. Now she blames herself and apologized, saying she'll try harder at paying attention to me. I just don't know at this point. Am I smothering her with attention? Is she using me? Is god real? What's going to happen when I die? Who knows.
Any insight would be appreciated. Thank you for reading.
Cut your losses and pack your worries in your trusty rucksack.
I dunno, that was the lyrics of some song urging people to go fight in the First World War. I assume since people typically post lyrics to these things, my response is equally relevant.
That's what I've been thinking. I'm currently trying to cool down the situation, just think about things.
It also helps to just "watch" my emotions and not embrace them. Helps to keep a clear mind and making decisions I want, not what my emotions wants.
That's true.
I would say from what I see, she's loyal to you and isn't using you. Perhaps she's been a bit shy about clinging to you, insecure girls can be like that.
Some backstory:
She's kind of insecure (like some girls I've dated in the past) and so I try to remind her that she's pretty, smart, skillful, etc. Of course I don't say it in vain, I do mean it when I say it but I'm afraid it contributes to a bigger problem. Saying I'm trying to help ease her insecurity would be a poor excuse, and to tell the truth I'm just really attracted to her. Since I enjoy being around her so much and love talking to her in return I give her a lot of attention. This includes helping her with emotional and life problems.
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Today hasn't been fun for me. I woke up late and anxious and I got tired pretty quickly throughout the day. I started to get a headache after playing Killing Floor so I decided to try and calm down and drink some water. Relaxing took about 30 minutes I guess. In the meantime I was in a skype call with her and wasn't saying much because she wasn't either. I decided that maybe getting some fresh air would help alleviate my headache, just getting some sun y'know?
I came back in about 15 minutes and asked if I could join her TF2 game and so I did. She spent the most time and attention I've ever seen on me, even though I was only gone for about half an hour (15 mins physically, 15 probably mentally lol). She's gone for plenty of time before without me, what made now different?
So I questioned her about it. She said she just missed me, which really ticked off the little suspicious and paranoid time-bomb in me. I thought that she only liked my attention, not actually me. She would only talk to me when she wanted the attention, never spending time with me when or thinking about it. She says she forgot. She's BEEN saying that the past few days, "Oh I'm sorry, I forgot we were supposed to play together" or some crap like "I wasn't thinking about it, sorry." I feel like I'm being used.
Then we got into an argument about it. Now she blames herself and apologized, saying she'll try harder at paying attention to me. I just don't know at this point. Am I smothering her with attention? Is she using me? Is god real? What's going to happen when I die? Who knows.
Any insight would be appreciated. Thank you for reading.
I dunno, that was the lyrics of some song urging people to go fight in the First World War. I assume since people typically post lyrics to these things, my response is equally relevant.
I'd probably let yourself some time to cool down before talking to her again, try resolve any issues after that.
That's what I've been thinking. I'm currently trying to cool down the situation, just think about things.
It also helps to just "watch" my emotions and not embrace them. Helps to keep a clear mind and making decisions I want, not what my emotions wants.
I would say from what I see, she's loyal to you and isn't using you. Perhaps she's been a bit shy about clinging to you, insecure girls can be like that.