hmm... blonde jokes. my hair's blonde so theyre okay for me. even if i'm a boy.
three blondes were walking through the forest when they came across a set of tracks.
the first blonde said that they were deer tracks and that they should follow them.
the second said they were bear tracks and that they should run from them.
the third blonde said that they were rabbit tracks and that they should ignore them.
rumor has it they were still arguing when the train hit them.
an extremely gross one:
a blonde, a redhead and a brunette go walking through a forest.
the blonde one says she has to take a crap and goes behind a tree.
the brunette and redhead see a dead rabbit and decide to pull a prank on the blonde.
they gut the rabbit and put the guts under the blonde while she's not looking. (dont ask me how)
afterwards the stifle laughs when they hear the blonde yell "you wouldnt believe what just happened!"
the blonde goes on to tell them that she acidentally crapped out her intestines and the redhead and brunette burst out laughing.
the blonde doesnt understand why they're laughing at her dilemma, and but keeps talking.
she then details her venture and tells them how she wouldve died if it werent for her quick thinking and the two fingers she used to put all her guts back in.
So there's a trout in the river. Above him there's a fly he's watching. "If that fly just drops six inches lower," the trout says, "then I could have a good dinner."
Little did the trout know, there was a bear on the shore. Watching the trout, he thinks to himself, "Man, if that fly drops down six inches and the trout jumps up to get it, then I'll have me a gooood dinner."
But, the bear didn't know it, but he was being watched. A hunter down the way was sitting in his shelter thinking to himself: "If that fly just drops six more inches, and that bear goes to grab that trout, then I'll have ma good hunt!"
Well, the hunter was also a fool because he didn't know he was being watched. Behind him there was a little mouse who was thinking to himself: "If that fly drops six inches, and the trout jumps to catch it, and the bear goes to eat it, then the hunter goes to shoot it, then I can have this good piece of cheese in his pocket."
But lo, this whole scene was being observed by a patient Bobcat. Sitting on a limb he muses excitedly: "If that fly just drops six more inches then-"
But he was cut short and he fell into the river.
The Moral of the story: if the fly drops six inches then the ***** gets wet.
three blondes were walking through the forest when they came across a set of tracks.
the first blonde said that they were deer tracks and that they should follow them.
the second said they were bear tracks and that they should run from them.
the third blonde said that they were rabbit tracks and that they should ignore them.
rumor has it they were still arguing when the train hit them.
an extremely gross one:
the blonde one says she has to take a crap and goes behind a tree.
the brunette and redhead see a dead rabbit and decide to pull a prank on the blonde.
they gut the rabbit and put the guts under the blonde while she's not looking. (dont ask me how)
afterwards the stifle laughs when they hear the blonde yell "you wouldnt believe what just happened!"
the blonde goes on to tell them that she acidentally crapped out her intestines and the redhead and brunette burst out laughing.
the blonde doesnt understand why they're laughing at her dilemma, and but keeps talking.
she then details her venture and tells them how she wouldve died if it werent for her quick thinking and the two fingers she used to put all her guts back in.
It's science. No joke can be funnier.
cut a hole in the ice, put peas around the hole, then when the polar bear comes to take a pea you kick it in the ice hole.
Hurr.
the heck?
Little did the trout know, there was a bear on the shore. Watching the trout, he thinks to himself, "Man, if that fly drops down six inches and the trout jumps up to get it, then I'll have me a gooood dinner."
But, the bear didn't know it, but he was being watched. A hunter down the way was sitting in his shelter thinking to himself: "If that fly just drops six more inches, and that bear goes to grab that trout, then I'll have ma good hunt!"
Well, the hunter was also a fool because he didn't know he was being watched. Behind him there was a little mouse who was thinking to himself: "If that fly drops six inches, and the trout jumps to catch it, and the bear goes to eat it, then the hunter goes to shoot it, then I can have this good piece of cheese in his pocket."
But lo, this whole scene was being observed by a patient Bobcat. Sitting on a limb he muses excitedly: "If that fly just drops six more inches then-"
But he was cut short and he fell into the river.
The Moral of the story: if the fly drops six inches then the ***** gets wet.
BA DUM TISH
My DeviantArt, so sexy
I killed his parents and sent a creepy bald guy with no nose after him.
edit: IM AN AIRPLANE, A LARGE AIRPLANE!
I know. That's why its funny
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