I question your judgement on accepting Trey, Cobra. His profile doesn't look like it's much better from Lopmine's, it's just a little bulkier. And then there's rule nine to consider.
Quote from CraftingCobras »
9. Grammar and spelling is a must.
I personally believe that any characters who wish to join must have good grammar in their application, else it is a violation of this rule. Trey obviously doesn't have much of the spelling or really anything when he's typing(At least he doesn't 1337speak).
I question your judgement on accepting Trey, Cobra. His profile doesn't look like it's much better from Lopmine's, it's just a little bulkier. And then there's rule nine to consider.
I personally believe that any characters who wish to join must have good grammar in their application, else it is a violation of this rule. Trey obviously doesn't have much of the spelling or really anything when he's typing(At least he doesn't 1337speak).
Hm... You bring up an extremely good point. I guess I'm gonna have to revoke ((is that the right word?)) you're application Trey. Feel free to re-apply. Just work on your spelling and grammar. Thanks, and sorry.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it! <3
Back, and its ok, Atleast the roleplay makers here dont make overused roleplays like on another game such as 'POKEHMUN ROLPLAY OLOLOL' and pages full of other overused/noobish roleplays.
Class: Ranger (I realize Feils are typically mages, but I wanted my character to be different.)
Skills: Being a Feil, most expect him to be good in the field of magic. However, he is instead excellent in archery, and is quite lacking in magic. He can also make different herbal potions from crops he farms himself.
Description: Ariscai is a slightly tall Feil at 5"6. He wears white pants which are slightly wide at the bottom and a black shirt with 2 holes in the back for his black wings. He has blue eyes and grey hair, slightly longer on the left side. He isn't as thin as most Feils, but he isn't built up or fat either.
Personality: (Why no bipolar?) Ariscai is normally stern and serious, but, when you get on his good side, he can be light-hearted. When nervous, his reactions can slow down and he can be a bit off in most everything. The solutions he comes up with for problems are often very unorthodox.
Biography: Ariscai (Ari for short), as far as he can remember, has lived his whole live alone in the wilderness. He didn't build a shelter, he just slept in trees. He didn't have any magic skills, he had a makeshift bow he made from strong webs he found in a cave. Ari's past before then has been shrouded in mystery all this time, but a new adventure awaits that will arise new ideas and memories that he didn't know he had.
In reality, however, he was actually abandoned by his parents many years ago. They left him on a desolate beach, uninhabited by anyone. Left with him was a satchel of supplies: some bread and meat, empty bottles and different herbs (he would later use these to make his potions), a short sword and a bow with a sheath of 30 arrows (since then, he has lost twelve of them). He was only 12 back then.
But he learned to fend for himself. It was a bit awkward using the sword, so Ari eventually resorted to the bow, which turned out to be a good choice. After 2 strenuous years of practicing, he made an excellent ranger that could be acceptable for even the highest class military commanders.
On his 21st birthday - he had been in that place for 9 years now - Fate decided that it would give him a little surprise. While hiking through the woods one day, he heard a strange rustling nearby and ran to the source. The sound led him into a thick jungle, where he found a tree with a large chunk taken out of it - like a lumberjack had chopped through it halfway and left it there. However, he found it not likely to be the case.
Around the tree, right where the gap was, was a strange charm on a black thread. Now, the charm was around the already-cut bit of the tree, so it was actually impossible for someone to have put it there. Nevertheless, he looked around for who put the impossible necklace there, to no result. He tried to pull the charm off and pop the string, but it held fast like granite. Eventually he gave up and went back to his home tree. Later, though, this charm would prove to have some significance.
Languages: He speaks only English.
Building: Heck no.
Farming: Yes, Ari farms the herbs used in his potions.
Strengths: His logic skills, although quite unorthodox, often provide good results. His roundabout methods rarely hit any snags. He is also very skilled with a bow and arrows.
Weaknesses: He can run quite fast, but only for a very short period after which he becomes very tired. One of his wings is also slightly chipped, making it awkward for him to fly.
Fun Facts: Ari is afraid of pie and the colour purple. He also has a tenancy to stay away from sheep.
RP Example: It was finally time. After months of preparing, Ariscai was ready to go. He gathered all of his belongings, as few as they were, and left his tree.
And he stopped at the next one. He climbed up, put down his things except his bow and quiver, tended to his wing once more and went to sleep. Only five minutes of the day had passed, but Ari didn't care; he had nothing else to do except move to the next tree when he got bored.
Soon, however, he would go on a journey that will allow him to realize many things he didn't before. It was only a matter of time before his travel began.
Personality:Flask is a careing and a loveing guy,but sometimes he can get a little brutal.As long as he's in a war.Flask also is a pet lover, he loves pets a little to much though. He's also a lover.
Biography:((Hope you don't mine but im makeing it so it's like a story))Narrator:Ahhh, Flask the book of Flask. When Flask was five, hiss dad showed him how to work a sword. At this time Flask was never makeing mistakes with it, when he got older he knew what he wanted to be.But becuase he was fourteen during this time, the king and knights would laugh at him and say "What a foolish young swordsmen! He cannot weild a sword!" But one day when all the knights went to war they need more knights, Flask hurried up and got on the field but he had to let nobody know who he was. At the end of the fight people was asking him who he was? He took off his helmet and everyone was amazed. When Flask got old enough he became s knight for the kingdom of Neada people would scream his name. "FLASK! WIN THE NEXT BATTLE TO MAKE THOUL HAPPY!" He did not get this until he got 21. Narrator:You see kids you chase your dreams!
Languages:Human (English)
Building:When he was on the battle field he had to help some of the people with makeing cover,huts,fires,ect,but he can't build that good.
Farming:Yes,when he was in battle also he had to make farms for the ol' timers.
Strengths:Agility,Speed,Strength
Weaknesses:Luck,Magic
Fun Facts:Flask got his name becuase his dad was a scientist. So Flask comes from there. Also Flask smokes to soothe himself.
RP Example:When I was a knight for my kingdom I would suffer from the pain. Not from being a knight,but for seeing the blood. As people yelled my name I noticed I was a killer at the kingdom's feet. I ran away from home to due back the pain. I can't express my emotions......
Well, there are unfortunately quite a few flaws in your application.
Going from top to bottom, the first problem is your race. I'm pretty sure we don't have "cats that turn into humans".. I'm not sure if some Blitz can turn into their animal counter-part, but you would have to run it through with Cobra.
Second, there is no gender section in the app. 'Nuff said here.
Third is me judging your character more than anything actually being wrong. I think that a blue/purple/cyan/gray cat running around is silly. .. And cats don't have eyelashes.
Fourth, your biography is just random. First, you escape from some laboratory, then you meet some girl and sacrifice her to some evil deity or something. Then you just happen upon our settlement, completely oblivious to the destruction of almost all civilization on the continent? Please try to focus on one topic longer than only 3 sentences, and try to make them all coherent to each other.
Fifth, there is no such language as Animal. You can either meow, or think in cat form. That's pretty much it.
Sixth, an illness that prevents other diseases and poisons from affecting your body? That sounds more like a drug. Also, if initially you were particularly frail, and then add the side effect of the "illness", the fragility of your character would probably prevent him from moving. If he can't take a large beating, then just say so instead of coming up with some craziness. But that would be contradicting to your strengths.
Seventh, the fun facts. So you pretty much do things that a rogue might do..? That doesn't make much sense, especially since nothing like that was mentioned at all in the personality.
Eighth, add some draw-backs to your spells. They don't have to completely screw you over if you use them just once, make it so that you gotta pay for them.
Ninth, and lastly, there never was a limitation to whether or not you could learn spells.
Well, there are unfortunately quite a few flaws in your application.
Going from top to bottom, the first problem is your race. I'm pretty sure we don't have "cats that turn into humans".. I'm not sure if some Blitz can turn into their animal counter-part, but you would have to run it through with Cobra.
Second, there is no gender section in the app. 'Nuff said here.
Third is me judging your character more than anything actually being wrong. I think that a blue/purple/cyan/gray cat running around is silly. .. And cats don't have eyelashes.
Fourth, your biography is just random. First, you escape from some laboratory, then you meet some girl and sacrifice her to some evil deity or something. Then you just happen upon our settlement, completely oblivious to the destruction of almost all civilization on the continent? Please try to focus on one topic longer than only 3 sentences, and try to make them all coherent to each other.
Fifth, there is no such language as Animal. You can either meow, or think in cat form. That's pretty much it.
Sixth, an illness that prevents other diseases and poisons from affecting your body? That sounds more like a drug. Also, if initially you were particularly frail, and then add the side effect of the "illness", the fragility of your character would probably prevent him from moving. If he can't take a large beating, then just say so instead of coming up with some craziness. But that would be contradicting to your strengths.
Seventh, the fun facts. So you pretty much do things that a rogue might do..? That doesn't make much sense, especially since nothing like that was mentioned at all in the personality.
Eighth, add some draw-backs to your spells. They don't have to completely screw you over if you use them just once, make it so that you gotta pay for them.
Ninth, and lastly, there never was a limitation to whether or not you could learn spells.
Class: Explorer (read my sig; Engineer capabilities, good endurance etc.)
Skills: Tapasya's skills include: long distance hiking, foraging, first aid, experienced in disabling traps(and thereby at recreating them).
Description: Tapasya has blue eyes, curly brown hair, and a browned face from years on the road. He is a towering 6'5", and is clothed in a white cotton shirt and brown cotton pants held on with a rope belt. He carries most of his gear in his leather backpack, which is covered in straps holding small shovels and picks and side pockets containing maps and scrolls. He wears a small money pouch that hangs off of his belt; which contains a surprisingly large amount money. In his right hand (though liable to switch to his left if he needs to do something, since he is right-handed) he carries a long, oak staff that is as tall as him.
Personality: Tapasya likes to joke around and especially loves sarcasm. He talks to himself a lot when on the road alone, and imagines himself in different scenarios to make things more exciting (i.e. imagining he's a giant, and making booming sounds as he walks, laughing at the tiny people (ants) fleeing before him). His 'happy-go-lucky' attitude was obtained when he read a book about being detached. Tapasya never misses a chance to show off the vast knowledge he has picked up over the years, and often quotes different phrases in other languages to the variety of species he meets, often to his ridicule (his copy of "Elven, Dwarven, and Other Obscure Languages" contains many mistranslations).
Biography: Born into a farmer's family in a small village in the middle of nowhere, Tapasya spent his youth working on the farm, hiking, and throwing rocks/other things you do for fun. He learned how to read from his scholarly Grandfather, who lived with Tapasya's parents. Becoming an avid reader, Tapasya devoured every book and map he could get his hands on, learning much about the world, such as different practices of meditation, how to make dwarven ale, and whatnot. Reading about all the adventures of others developed a desire in him to experience his own. He told his parents, who, after much discussion, tearfully decided it was ok. With their blessings, he was now free to go; he took some supplies and whatever money could be spared and left to see the world.
He spent years wandering around visiting the various wonders of the world until he chanced across an old map leading to an abandoned wizard tower. He decided to follow it for the adventure it could entail. However, when he finally found the tower, he was nearly killed right off from the magical traps inside and had to learn on the fly how to survive them. It was worth it though, for when he reached the tower's storehouse, he discovered a wealth of magical items, gaining him a fortune. He later buried the money he got from there in different caches around the main travel ways so he could access it easily whenever needed, but the most important find to him in the storehouse was a pile of maps and scrolls which contained details of how to find other sites such as this one. Tapasya thought back on the day and realized how exciting his little adventure had been. He wanted to continue doing them for the rest of his life; he packed up the scrolls and maps and set out to do just that.
He was on his way to find a buried crypt of some long-forgotten wizard-ruler when he was knocked unconscious, and then awoke to find himself in a crater.
Languages: Tapasya knows English and basics/random bits of other languages
Building: He has no experience of building.
Farming: Tapasya spent his whole childhood farming, but hasn't done that kind of work in years.
QWERTY
Strengths: He is strong, fit, has a sharp mind, is charismatic, has a lot of book smarts, can perform basic first aid, has been living on the road for a long time, is good at throwing rocks, and is very knowledgeable about making/disabling traps.
Weaknesses: He doesn't really know how to fight, makes a fool of himself easily (mainly when showing off his vast 'knowledge'), not very comfortable in the 'big city', or when stuck somewhere for too long, he would be unwilling to attack someone except in self-defense, and has never killed anyone. He is also a vegetarian, limiting what food he can eat.
Fun Facts: Tapasya practices various meditation techniques; he also knows how to count to 10 in elven. His favorite activity is roleplaying, usually by himself to pass the time as he walks long distances.
RP Example: Tapasya chuckled to himself as he watched the frog jump from one lily pad to the other, sending ripples through the swampy waters. Tapasya was sitting in a clump of tall grass next to the water, sketching this most recent find onto his journal. The frog was huge! It was at least as big as his head! He shook his head in wonder, continuing the sketch. Once he got all the most important 'froggy' details down, he set his journal down and stood up and stretched, startling the frog. It hurriedly jumped into the murky waters, generating mini tsunamis in the water for all the various insect life residing on the surface. Tapasya chuckled again, put his backpack on, picked up his staff, and headed off to find the abandoned wizard tower rumored to be in the middle of the swamp.
Anything I should add?: capacity for AZERTY keyboards. Also, under the "races" section you put "_____ - You can make your own class, and I'll see about adding it. Please go into some detail." I think you meant to say 'race' instead of class'
First off, the race that I think you are referring to is spelled Fiel. Second, overall, your application is well thought up, but lacks detail. This is shown in the biography. You are denied for now. Please add some more to your application and it should be good.
Your ideas are good but it lacks some things. First off, please check your spelling. I found multiple spelling mistakes. Second, you need a bit more detail. The way that you described your biography is fine, but it is very short and rushed. Until you fix it, you are denied.
Denied. First off, you need to work on your grammar, such as capitalizing the beginning of sentences. Secondly, you need a LOT more detail. This is needed most in the biography and personality. "Completely normal human personality" does not suffice.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it! <3
AHEM, qwerty
Name (Do not name them John Adams): Joe
Age (A 12 year old or similar will be instantly denied): (IG)100 (IRL) 14
Race (This is where you would describe a custom race): fyre
Class (Choose ONE class): mage (specifically fire spells)
Skills (What can your character do? Pick locks?): he is good at getting information out of people, as well as demolition, he can take down a structure that would normally take days in hours, he is a fast learner, and can build fairly decent structures.
Description (Describe how your character looks like. What are they wearing? LOTS OF DETAIL): Joe has long curly hair, a darker skin color than the rest of his race, grey eyes, and is around 6'5". He wears orange robes that have a sun on them, he also wears iron boots, and he has charred tights under his robes
Personality (How would your character normally react. No bi-polar characters): Anyone he has deemed a friend, he will fight for until the death, he is sarcastic, caring during times of stress, stubborn,
Biography (What is your character's past? Lots of details is good): Joe was a builder as a young fyre, he was saving money to go and hire someone to teach him magic, after he recieved enough gold, he hired a skilled mage to teach him how to cast a few spells, Then after that, Joe became a hired weapon, but quit after he saw a sight he will never forget. It was a little boy and his parents, dead in the mud, they had scared him, he shot his fireball without realizing it was a family. 3 years later, he went to his parents house for their annual family dinner, but when he arrived, the house was gone, it was blown up, Joe ran over to the buildings ruined structure and found both of his parents dead. Joe started crying boiling tears, his own parents were face down on the charred wooden floor... How was he supposed to cope?
Languages (What languages does your character speak, write, and read?): English and Dwarven are the two languages he can speak
Building (Can your character build things?): yes, that's how he earned his gold in his young age
Farming (Can your character farm?): no.
Strengths (What strengths does your character have?): he is strong willed, skilled in fire magic, has an extreme sense of right and wrong,
Weaknesses (Stubbed toe is not a weakness): Will save any he has deemed a friend even in exchange for his own life, impatient, doesn't know when to stop talking
Fun Facts (Anything your character does. Do they smoke? Write that here): at one point tried to be a translator for a dwarf in a human village, but eventually got angry at the dwarf for slurring words and stormed off.
Spells:
fireball: A simple fireball...
shield: A protective shield, draws off of the life force of the caster (meaning if the caster defends someone from a sword to the stomach, he takes a heavy blow, as if he were punched in the face), the caster can also manipulate objects with this so the caster can pull levers from a distance, pick items up, or save people from long falls.
fire stream: A stream of fire from the casters hand, close distance spell
RP Example (RP your character's past. Any part.):sad.gif:(Ummmmm... is this an rp post of the characters past? I guess...)) Joe was working in the hot sun, laying down stone after stone, waiting for his gold to arrive, this was almost it! Joe was extremely excited, he was going to learn magic! He had been interested in magic as long as he could remember and now he was going to learn it! When his boss showed up, he was impressed at how much progress Joe had made, he walked up to him and said, "Good work Joe! If someone else was here, I'd have thought they did it, the sun is going down soon, here's a bonus for the good work today kid, see you tomorrow!" Joe held the pouch of coins in his hands as if they were a gift from god. He ran home as fast as he could, he found the rest of his coins in his dresser, where he stored all of his money. I can't believe this is actually happening! Joe thought merrily to himself, I am ACTUALLY going to learn magic! Joe walked to the tavern in town, hiding his gold under his tunic.
"You wouldn't happen to know where the mage teacher is, would you?" Joe asked the bartender politely.
"Yes, he's leaving town in the next week, you will find him in the room over there," The bartender pointed to the room in the corner.
"thanks," Joe went over to the mages room and knocked on the door, he was invited inside...
Anything I should add? (What would make this RP better?): maybe the story in the ooc post so I can always look up to revise my bio
kk updated it, before I wasn't sure if you wanted me to just state the facts or write in complete sentences;yes, I was being lazy. I changed everything to complete sentences. I added more details, too, I think you'll like it.
Accepted! Feel free to start posting whenever you feel like.
Denied. Not bad. You need to add more detail, and read the main post more carefully.
Accepted! But please try and work on your grammar and do not double post. Feel free to start posting!
I personally believe that any characters who wish to join must have good grammar in their application, else it is a violation of this rule. Trey obviously doesn't have much of the spelling or really anything when he's typing(At least he doesn't 1337speak).
Hm... You bring up an extremely good point. I guess I'm gonna have to revoke ((is that the right word?)) you're application Trey. Feel free to re-apply. Just work on your spelling and grammar. Thanks, and sorry.
Age: 22
Race: Feil
Class: Ranger (I realize Feils are typically mages, but I wanted my character to be different.)
Skills: Being a Feil, most expect him to be good in the field of magic. However, he is instead excellent in archery, and is quite lacking in magic. He can also make different herbal potions from crops he farms himself.
Description: Ariscai is a slightly tall Feil at 5"6. He wears white pants which are slightly wide at the bottom and a black shirt with 2 holes in the back for his black wings. He has blue eyes and grey hair, slightly longer on the left side. He isn't as thin as most Feils, but he isn't built up or fat either.
Personality: (Why no bipolar?) Ariscai is normally stern and serious, but, when you get on his good side, he can be light-hearted. When nervous, his reactions can slow down and he can be a bit off in most everything. The solutions he comes up with for problems are often very unorthodox.
Biography: Ariscai (Ari for short), as far as he can remember, has lived his whole live alone in the wilderness. He didn't build a shelter, he just slept in trees. He didn't have any magic skills, he had a makeshift bow he made from strong webs he found in a cave. Ari's past before then has been shrouded in mystery all this time, but a new adventure awaits that will arise new ideas and memories that he didn't know he had.
In reality, however, he was actually abandoned by his parents many years ago. They left him on a desolate beach, uninhabited by anyone. Left with him was a satchel of supplies: some bread and meat, empty bottles and different herbs (he would later use these to make his potions), a short sword and a bow with a sheath of 30 arrows (since then, he has lost twelve of them). He was only 12 back then.
But he learned to fend for himself. It was a bit awkward using the sword, so Ari eventually resorted to the bow, which turned out to be a good choice. After 2 strenuous years of practicing, he made an excellent ranger that could be acceptable for even the highest class military commanders.
On his 21st birthday - he had been in that place for 9 years now - Fate decided that it would give him a little surprise. While hiking through the woods one day, he heard a strange rustling nearby and ran to the source. The sound led him into a thick jungle, where he found a tree with a large chunk taken out of it - like a lumberjack had chopped through it halfway and left it there. However, he found it not likely to be the case.
Around the tree, right where the gap was, was a strange charm on a black thread. Now, the charm was around the already-cut bit of the tree, so it was actually impossible for someone to have put it there. Nevertheless, he looked around for who put the impossible necklace there, to no result. He tried to pull the charm off and pop the string, but it held fast like granite. Eventually he gave up and went back to his home tree. Later, though, this charm would prove to have some significance.
Languages: He speaks only English.
Building: Heck no.
Farming: Yes, Ari farms the herbs used in his potions.
Strengths: His logic skills, although quite unorthodox, often provide good results. His roundabout methods rarely hit any snags. He is also very skilled with a bow and arrows.
Weaknesses: He can run quite fast, but only for a very short period after which he becomes very tired. One of his wings is also slightly chipped, making it awkward for him to fly.
Fun Facts: Ari is afraid of pie and the colour purple. He also has a tenancy to stay away from sheep.
RP Example: It was finally time. After months of preparing, Ariscai was ready to go. He gathered all of his belongings, as few as they were, and left his tree.
And he stopped at the next one. He climbed up, put down his things except his bow and quiver, tended to his wing once more and went to sleep. Only five minutes of the day had passed, but Ari didn't care; he had nothing else to do except move to the next tree when he got bored.
Soon, however, he would go on a journey that will allow him to realize many things he didn't before. It was only a matter of time before his travel began.
Anything I should add?: Nothing.
QWERTY
Here's a story I'm writing. So yeah.
Silent Raven
Fixed.
Here's a story I'm writing. So yeah.
Silent Raven
Here's a story I'm writing. So yeah.
Silent Raven
Age:23
Race:Human
Class:Warrior
Skills:Flask is good with a sword, he will fight with any knid and probaley win.
Description:Height: 8'9 Race:White Hair style & color:Black,is cut low. Wears leather armour.
Personality:Flask is a careing and a loveing guy,but sometimes he can get a little brutal.As long as he's in a war.Flask also is a pet lover, he loves pets a little to much though. He's also a lover.
Biography:((Hope you don't mine but im makeing it so it's like a story))Narrator:Ahhh, Flask the book of Flask. When Flask was five, hiss dad showed him how to work a sword. At this time Flask was never makeing mistakes with it, when he got older he knew what he wanted to be.But becuase he was fourteen during this time, the king and knights would laugh at him and say "What a foolish young swordsmen! He cannot weild a sword!" But one day when all the knights went to war they need more knights, Flask hurried up and got on the field but he had to let nobody know who he was. At the end of the fight people was asking him who he was? He took off his helmet and everyone was amazed. When Flask got old enough he became s knight for the kingdom of Neada people would scream his name. "FLASK! WIN THE NEXT BATTLE TO MAKE THOUL HAPPY!" He did not get this until he got 21. Narrator:You see kids you chase your dreams!
Languages:Human (English)
Building:When he was on the battle field he had to help some of the people with makeing cover,huts,fires,ect,but he can't build that good.
Farming:Yes,when he was in battle also he had to make farms for the ol' timers.
Strengths:Agility,Speed,Strength
Weaknesses:Luck,Magic
Fun Facts:Flask got his name becuase his dad was a scientist. So Flask comes from there. Also Flask smokes to soothe himself.
RP Example:When I was a knight for my kingdom I would suffer from the pain. Not from being a knight,but for seeing the blood. As people yelled my name I noticed I was a killer at the kingdom's feet. I ran away from home to due back the pain. I can't express my emotions......
Anything I should add?:Add QWERTY
OnceInALongTime: "You confuse me, Mage. Amazability should be a word so I could describe your words."
-Perpetually inactive-
OnceInALongTime: "You confuse me, Mage. Amazability should be a word so I could describe your words."
-Perpetually inactive-
Well, there are unfortunately quite a few flaws in your application.
Going from top to bottom, the first problem is your race. I'm pretty sure we don't have "cats that turn into humans".. I'm not sure if some Blitz can turn into their animal counter-part, but you would have to run it through with Cobra.
Second, there is no gender section in the app. 'Nuff said here.
Third is me judging your character more than anything actually being wrong. I think that a blue/purple/cyan/gray cat running around is silly. .. And cats don't have eyelashes.
Fourth, your biography is just random. First, you escape from some laboratory, then you meet some girl and sacrifice her to some evil deity or something. Then you just happen upon our settlement, completely oblivious to the destruction of almost all civilization on the continent? Please try to focus on one topic longer than only 3 sentences, and try to make them all coherent to each other.
Fifth, there is no such language as Animal. You can either meow, or think in cat form. That's pretty much it.
Sixth, an illness that prevents other diseases and poisons from affecting your body? That sounds more like a drug. Also, if initially you were particularly frail, and then add the side effect of the "illness", the fragility of your character would probably prevent him from moving. If he can't take a large beating, then just say so instead of coming up with some craziness. But that would be contradicting to your strengths.
Seventh, the fun facts. So you pretty much do things that a rogue might do..? That doesn't make much sense, especially since nothing like that was mentioned at all in the personality.
Eighth, add some draw-backs to your spells. They don't have to completely screw you over if you use them just once, make it so that you gotta pay for them.
Ninth, and lastly, there never was a limitation to whether or not you could learn spells.
Well, there are unfortunately quite a few flaws in your application.
Going from top to bottom, the first problem is your race. I'm pretty sure we don't have "cats that turn into humans".. I'm not sure if some Blitz can turn into their animal counter-part, but you would have to run it through with Cobra.
Second, there is no gender section in the app. 'Nuff said here.
Third is me judging your character more than anything actually being wrong. I think that a blue/purple/cyan/gray cat running around is silly. .. And cats don't have eyelashes.
Fourth, your biography is just random. First, you escape from some laboratory, then you meet some girl and sacrifice her to some evil deity or something. Then you just happen upon our settlement, completely oblivious to the destruction of almost all civilization on the continent? Please try to focus on one topic longer than only 3 sentences, and try to make them all coherent to each other.
Fifth, there is no such language as Animal. You can either meow, or think in cat form. That's pretty much it.
Sixth, an illness that prevents other diseases and poisons from affecting your body? That sounds more like a drug. Also, if initially you were particularly frail, and then add the side effect of the "illness", the fragility of your character would probably prevent him from moving. If he can't take a large beating, then just say so instead of coming up with some craziness. But that would be contradicting to your strengths.
Seventh, the fun facts. So you pretty much do things that a rogue might do..? That doesn't make much sense, especially since nothing like that was mentioned at all in the personality.
Eighth, add some draw-backs to your spells. They don't have to completely screw you over if you use them just once, make it so that you gotta pay for them.
Ninth, and lastly, there never was a limitation to whether or not you could learn spells.
Nevermind...
I figured that you'd be more open minded on apps.
Cya.
...
OnceInALongTime: "You confuse me, Mage. Amazability should be a word so I could describe your words."
-Perpetually inactive-
I could say the same. Fine, if that's how you feel. You can come back whenever you want though.
Name: Tapasya
Age: 21
Race: Human
Class: Explorer (read my sig; Engineer capabilities, good endurance etc.)
Skills: Tapasya's skills include: long distance hiking, foraging, first aid, experienced in disabling traps(and thereby at recreating them).
Description: Tapasya has blue eyes, curly brown hair, and a browned face from years on the road. He is a towering 6'5", and is clothed in a white cotton shirt and brown cotton pants held on with a rope belt. He carries most of his gear in his leather backpack, which is covered in straps holding small shovels and picks and side pockets containing maps and scrolls. He wears a small money pouch that hangs off of his belt; which contains a surprisingly large amount money. In his right hand (though liable to switch to his left if he needs to do something, since he is right-handed) he carries a long, oak staff that is as tall as him.
Personality: Tapasya likes to joke around and especially loves sarcasm. He talks to himself a lot when on the road alone, and imagines himself in different scenarios to make things more exciting (i.e. imagining he's a giant, and making booming sounds as he walks, laughing at the tiny people (ants) fleeing before him). His 'happy-go-lucky' attitude was obtained when he read a book about being detached. Tapasya never misses a chance to show off the vast knowledge he has picked up over the years, and often quotes different phrases in other languages to the variety of species he meets, often to his ridicule (his copy of "Elven, Dwarven, and Other Obscure Languages" contains many mistranslations).
Biography: Born into a farmer's family in a small village in the middle of nowhere, Tapasya spent his youth working on the farm, hiking, and throwing rocks/other things you do for fun. He learned how to read from his scholarly Grandfather, who lived with Tapasya's parents. Becoming an avid reader, Tapasya devoured every book and map he could get his hands on, learning much about the world, such as different practices of meditation, how to make dwarven ale, and whatnot. Reading about all the adventures of others developed a desire in him to experience his own. He told his parents, who, after much discussion, tearfully decided it was ok. With their blessings, he was now free to go; he took some supplies and whatever money could be spared and left to see the world.
He spent years wandering around visiting the various wonders of the world until he chanced across an old map leading to an abandoned wizard tower. He decided to follow it for the adventure it could entail. However, when he finally found the tower, he was nearly killed right off from the magical traps inside and had to learn on the fly how to survive them. It was worth it though, for when he reached the tower's storehouse, he discovered a wealth of magical items, gaining him a fortune. He later buried the money he got from there in different caches around the main travel ways so he could access it easily whenever needed, but the most important find to him in the storehouse was a pile of maps and scrolls which contained details of how to find other sites such as this one. Tapasya thought back on the day and realized how exciting his little adventure had been. He wanted to continue doing them for the rest of his life; he packed up the scrolls and maps and set out to do just that.
He was on his way to find a buried crypt of some long-forgotten wizard-ruler when he was knocked unconscious, and then awoke to find himself in a crater.
Languages: Tapasya knows English and basics/random bits of other languages
Building: He has no experience of building.
Farming: Tapasya spent his whole childhood farming, but hasn't done that kind of work in years.
QWERTY
Strengths: He is strong, fit, has a sharp mind, is charismatic, has a lot of book smarts, can perform basic first aid, has been living on the road for a long time, is good at throwing rocks, and is very knowledgeable about making/disabling traps.
Weaknesses: He doesn't really know how to fight, makes a fool of himself easily (mainly when showing off his vast 'knowledge'), not very comfortable in the 'big city', or when stuck somewhere for too long, he would be unwilling to attack someone except in self-defense, and has never killed anyone. He is also a vegetarian, limiting what food he can eat.
Fun Facts: Tapasya practices various meditation techniques; he also knows how to count to 10 in elven. His favorite activity is roleplaying, usually by himself to pass the time as he walks long distances.
RP Example: Tapasya chuckled to himself as he watched the frog jump from one lily pad to the other, sending ripples through the swampy waters. Tapasya was sitting in a clump of tall grass next to the water, sketching this most recent find onto his journal. The frog was huge! It was at least as big as his head! He shook his head in wonder, continuing the sketch. Once he got all the most important 'froggy' details down, he set his journal down and stood up and stretched, startling the frog. It hurriedly jumped into the murky waters, generating mini tsunamis in the water for all the various insect life residing on the surface. Tapasya chuckled again, put his backpack on, picked up his staff, and headed off to find the abandoned wizard tower rumored to be in the middle of the swamp.
Anything I should add?: capacity for AZERTY keyboards. Also, under the "races" section you put "_____ - You can make your own class, and I'll see about adding it. Please go into some detail." I think you meant to say 'race' instead of class'
Here's a story I'm writing. So yeah.
Silent Raven
First off, the race that I think you are referring to is spelled Fiel. Second, overall, your application is well thought up, but lacks detail. This is shown in the biography. You are denied for now. Please add some more to your application and it should be good.
Your ideas are good but it lacks some things. First off, please check your spelling. I found multiple spelling mistakes. Second, you need a bit more detail. The way that you described your biography is fine, but it is very short and rushed. Until you fix it, you are denied.
Denied. First off, you need to work on your grammar, such as capitalizing the beginning of sentences. Secondly, you need a LOT more detail. This is needed most in the biography and personality. "Completely normal human personality" does not suffice.
Name (Do not name them John Adams): Joe
Age (A 12 year old or similar will be instantly denied): (IG)100 (IRL) 14
Race (This is where you would describe a custom race): fyre
Class (Choose ONE class): mage (specifically fire spells)
Skills (What can your character do? Pick locks?): he is good at getting information out of people, as well as demolition, he can take down a structure that would normally take days in hours, he is a fast learner, and can build fairly decent structures.
Description (Describe how your character looks like. What are they wearing? LOTS OF DETAIL): Joe has long curly hair, a darker skin color than the rest of his race, grey eyes, and is around 6'5". He wears orange robes that have a sun on them, he also wears iron boots, and he has charred tights under his robes
Personality (How would your character normally react. No bi-polar characters): Anyone he has deemed a friend, he will fight for until the death, he is sarcastic, caring during times of stress, stubborn,
Biography (What is your character's past? Lots of details is good): Joe was a builder as a young fyre, he was saving money to go and hire someone to teach him magic, after he recieved enough gold, he hired a skilled mage to teach him how to cast a few spells, Then after that, Joe became a hired weapon, but quit after he saw a sight he will never forget. It was a little boy and his parents, dead in the mud, they had scared him, he shot his fireball without realizing it was a family. 3 years later, he went to his parents house for their annual family dinner, but when he arrived, the house was gone, it was blown up, Joe ran over to the buildings ruined structure and found both of his parents dead. Joe started crying boiling tears, his own parents were face down on the charred wooden floor... How was he supposed to cope?
Languages (What languages does your character speak, write, and read?): English and Dwarven are the two languages he can speak
Building (Can your character build things?): yes, that's how he earned his gold in his young age
Farming (Can your character farm?): no.
Strengths (What strengths does your character have?): he is strong willed, skilled in fire magic, has an extreme sense of right and wrong,
Weaknesses (Stubbed toe is not a weakness): Will save any he has deemed a friend even in exchange for his own life, impatient, doesn't know when to stop talking
Fun Facts (Anything your character does. Do they smoke? Write that here): at one point tried to be a translator for a dwarf in a human village, but eventually got angry at the dwarf for slurring words and stormed off.
Spells:
fireball: A simple fireball...
shield: A protective shield, draws off of the life force of the caster (meaning if the caster defends someone from a sword to the stomach, he takes a heavy blow, as if he were punched in the face), the caster can also manipulate objects with this so the caster can pull levers from a distance, pick items up, or save people from long falls.
fire stream: A stream of fire from the casters hand, close distance spell
RP Example (RP your character's past. Any part.):sad.gif:(Ummmmm... is this an rp post of the characters past? I guess...)) Joe was working in the hot sun, laying down stone after stone, waiting for his gold to arrive, this was almost it! Joe was extremely excited, he was going to learn magic! He had been interested in magic as long as he could remember and now he was going to learn it! When his boss showed up, he was impressed at how much progress Joe had made, he walked up to him and said, "Good work Joe! If someone else was here, I'd have thought they did it, the sun is going down soon, here's a bonus for the good work today kid, see you tomorrow!" Joe held the pouch of coins in his hands as if they were a gift from god. He ran home as fast as he could, he found the rest of his coins in his dresser, where he stored all of his money. I can't believe this is actually happening! Joe thought merrily to himself, I am ACTUALLY going to learn magic! Joe walked to the tavern in town, hiding his gold under his tunic.
"You wouldn't happen to know where the mage teacher is, would you?" Joe asked the bartender politely.
"Yes, he's leaving town in the next week, you will find him in the room over there," The bartender pointed to the room in the corner.
"thanks," Joe went over to the mages room and knocked on the door, he was invited inside...
Anything I should add? (What would make this RP better?): maybe the story in the ooc post so I can always look up to revise my bio
Ah, I could have sworn it said 'Fein' in the op. Ah well.
And I really agree with you. I think I was just in a hurry when I initially wrote it. I'll edit it right away.
Here's a story I'm writing. So yeah.
Silent Raven