(sorry for missing 2 days i'm tech for a school play and it takes all day]
being the ninja that he is, he all ready is in a prime sniping location that is...somewhere that you cant seem to find out... as Axis fires David fires one round but the sound isnt quite right it starts out normal but its followed by a long whining sound, the round passer over Axis and in a fit of epicness taking up two days of luck goes down the barrel of the machine gun ripping apart its mechanisms and flying out the other side
"sorry about that Axis"
(first person to guess what the whining noise is from gets an e-cookie]
@Epicphail: A careful search reveals no grenades, but a landmine in the area. Are you feeling lucky?
@Cliff_Racer[-3]: The complex whispers in your ear in a voice reminiscent of a disgruntled mother, "Oh, stop whining, you big baby. It's just a flesh wound. Now get up and shoot them this instant!"
You pull yourself together and chamber your blank in the revolver that actually needs ammo. Why would you shoot this thing, anyway? Not like it will do much. Whatever; you're ready to fight.
@MechaMage: This is going to be great. As soon as the shooting starts, you are absolutely going to unload on those nationalist war-mongers. You check the readiness of your weapon and scope in on the unaware opposition. Now, you wait.
@Killer: What a daydream that was. It'd be pretty awesome if that actually happened. You're sure the complex will reward your awe-inspiring mindset in the short future. Anyway, you keep close watch on the targets inside. Your reticule drifts over them as you pick out your victims. Bang! Pow! Boom! You imagine shooting them before the gunfire actually starts. It was pretty awesome, too.
Something great is going to happen for you, you can feel it.
@AI: Time to get this party started.
@Party: A hideous war cry is let out by the chainsaw-spearman. He rushes inside and alerts the Germans, putting his life in the hands of his well-prepared team.
David takes the first shot, letting fly a single round toward the Nazi machine-gunner. The bullet is taken by the grenade strapped to his belt; it detonates instantly, killing him and wounding the nearby spotters. In its wake, only a mangled heap of a man and two horrified German soldiers remain.
Axis calls out targets over radio for Rodric, who dispatches them with due efficiency. Half of them don't even have time to pick up their guns before receiving a dose of high-velocity lead. When this gets boring, Mr. Cufeti is quick to arms, wielding the revolver that needs no ammunition. He overpowers the pain in his bullet-riddled leg, standing and letting loose a storm of immaterial ammunition.
When one soldier tries to flee the bunker empty-handed, he runs head-on into Axis. Feeling courages, Ol' Wagonwheel takes out his sidearm loaded with only a blank. Dumbfounded, the German can only stand locked in fear. Axis shoots the blank and the German faints at the thought of his imminent death.
That ghost-like thing takes its chances picking up a deadened landmine. He hurls it inside and is content with the resultant scream.
((The next part isn't important for anyone else, so you don't have to read it. It's just a dramatic fight scene as outlined in my personal goals. If someone else wants one of these, just ask.))
Almost no one is left for Matt. One guy thought he could hide under a desk, but was discovered and scared out of hiding by burst of flame from the madman's wrist-mounted weapon. The German scurried out of cover and stood; he reached for his sidearm to find that it was on a table across the room, where he left it in fear. With a burst of courage and no other option, he draws a combat knife. The soldier's smartest move comes first, and he runs toward Matt to close the distance from that freakish polearm. Matt braces the shaft of the weapon between them, and takes the brunt of the German's weight as he tries to push him against the back wall. The Nazi succeeds in pinning back the frenzied fighter, but doesn't have the fighting experience to avoid the knee and kick thrown to escape the hold. The Nazi falls backward onto the floor, and it was luck alone that let him dodge the drop of the chainsaw as Matthew strikes it down onto him. Rolling out of the way, he tries to grab the weapon, but the spinning chains bear into his arm as it is pulled back out of range. He jumps to his feet and returns to hand-to-hand fighting; not giving up the opportunity again, he kicks directly into Matthew's stomach and slices across the aggressor's closest arm with his knife, causing Matt to draw back in pain. The German tries to run forth once again, but Matt raises the chain-lance as he approaches, and it roars painfully across his lower torso. He falls onto the floor in pain, unable to find the strength to stand. Matt takes the pistol from the table across the bunker and pulls the trigger at the German's head... It's empty. Matt throws it into the air and grabs it by the barrel, using the handle as a club to finish the valiant enemy.
[-2 knife, lowered weapon effectiveness]
[-1 kick, no penalty]
((/dramatic fight scene. Probably makes me look greedy. Sorry. Really.))
----------
I invite my allies into the bunker so we can find that elevator.
I head on in, laughing and whooping. "Yeeeehaw! Ain't seen fightin' like that in a long time!" I clap my hands together, laughing giddily. I get right down to buisness, investigating the bunker.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
I am NOT going to see friend requests, so stop sending them.
@AI[-3]: They walk in, and it's boring. What a horrible waste of a turn.
@Epicphail: The walk uphill is tiring. Not really tiring, but enough that it made you think about it. The bunker's pretty uninteresting at first glance. And second glance. And any subsequent glances taken to verify the conclusions drawn from the original glances. Blar.
@Cliff_Racer[-3]: You shoot off a round into the sky, and chuckle at the thought that it might kill someone way out where. You taunt the corpses of your fallen victims like a true proud cowboy and suddenly become disgruntled at the appalling lack of WHISKEY in their collective possession. What softies; you bet they drank juice as children.
((I realized BBCode was still broken right about here.))
You head on into the broken bunker and are simply taken aback by the amazing triumph you had here. Obviously, level two is a great benchmark for the entire dungeon complex and every progressing level will stay at this low difficulty level. Wonderful. Or yee-haw. Clearly, the mind of the complex doesn't share your old-western spirit.
@MechaMage: Your radio call-out is ignored. Either everyone died or there are no survivors left to care about. You equip your rocket launcher, and the sheer thought of its amazing firepower amplifies your courage (+2 bravery)!
@Party: The bunker is fairly typical. Concrete walls, concrete floor, concrete ceiling. Most of the ceiling is gone, actually, along with part of a wall. The defining feature is a semi-large crater opposite the firing window. It was unmistakably created by a strong kinetic impact with the structure of the bunker... but by what?
Everyone's best guess lies with the undetonated, eerily familiar, 500-pound bomb at the bottom of the crater, but who can be sure?
One thing that's certainly apparent is that you don't see an elevator. There are dead Nazis, tables with strategic maps, squad radios, and two supply crates... but not an elevator. At least there should be some valuables worth taking.
----------
I search the area for any kind of currency. Unbeknownst to my allies until they inevitably read my mind, goods of such monetary value will prove very helpful, nigh essential, in our journey.
@AI: The cabinets contain a total of forty Deutschmarks, which you will dispense among your team if you're feeling generous.
"Without any warning or outstanding implication against it, I will proceed to poke the thing in the crater," you quip, "by which I mean specifically mess with its inner workings and, in a wonderfully ironic display, things that make it tick." Your allies will not mourn your passing.
@MechaMage: Your search for hats returns two German combat helmets, a grey grenadier's cap, and an American baseball hat. How'd that get there? This was an amazing success.
Matt is most certainly going to poke the thing in the crater, though.
@Cliff_Racer: Unspent bullets are everywhere; lining bandoliers, filling magazines and boxes... Too bad none of it is the right caliber to fit your revolvers. You load them in, anyway.
Science cannot explain this.
----------
I attempt to arm the bomb in the crater, showing my allies another great example of outside-the-box puzzle-solving before I eventually hand that responsibility over to them.
"Lemme see that. Pops loved his 'splodin." I say, moving in towards the bomb. I assist Matt in the hopeful arming and certainly not premature detonation of the splodin' device.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
I am NOT going to see friend requests, so stop sending them.
@Epicphail: "This isn't really the outside world, so it's hard to say. Everything is pretty darn crazy in here, that's fer sure!" He rolls his eyes and you can see into his skin enough to make out the optic nerves twirling around with them.
Ew.
@MechaMage: You approach the nearest exit. The complex is disappointed by your boring action and throws a pen at you. It doesn't really hurt, but it makes you feel bad.
@Cliff_Racer & A.I.: Red wires are connected, locks are unlocked, bolts are unbolted, short circuits are... elongated? Whatever, it's fixed. Whoop de doo. Through the miracle of miracles, this thing is now a ticking time bomb.
You just don't know how much time you gave it!
----------
Uh... Get the heck out of there?
@MechaMage: Plot devices don't start randomly appearing until level seventy-four, silly! This is a minor obstacle, at best.
@Cliff_Racer: Not much important should happen this turn. It's kind of just to build suspense before the underwhelming event that follows. So, sure, why not run?
@AI: That ^.
@Party: The time bomb reaches zero. Soon, you would learn the true nature of its construction. Well, maybe not soon. Maybe recently. Maybe a long time ago. Maybe far in the future. Only time will tell. Heh.
The bomb does not detonate. It floats back up through the ceiling, all of the scattered debris following suit. Axis, Rodric, and Matt casually walk back out of its blast radius in the exact manner they had entered... except startlingly reversed. The crater reforms to the solid foundation it was just minutes earlier. The bunker structure becomes perfectly repaired as broken chunks of concrete move flawlessly back into their original positions. Out of its radius, the involved team members go outside to see the bomb. It drifts upward into the sky as a transport plane flies backward through its path. The two unite, and everyone suddenly understands.
It was a time bomb.
You see the bunker in its original design. In the corner is an elevator. Other items of interest include a safe, a mildly safe, and a completely unsafe. Wait... you don't get it.
@Epicphail: It's locked securely. Whatever is inside is being kept quite safe. There is a dial lock with numbers up to thirty, and you haven't the faintest idea of the correct combination.
@Cliff_Racer: It's locked... technically. It's an unsafe because whatever's inside isn't secured safely at all. It is operated by a keypad lock requesting a four-digit sequence of numbers. There is only one key on the board below it, reading "1".
It's kind of funny.
----------
I enter the elevator and resign myself to idleness until my allies are done here.
@Cliff_Racer: It opens. You immediately retrieve 9 Deutschmarks, whether you want to or not. Inside is a whiskey bottle. It's labeled of the "Ha Ha" brand of drink brewers, and is a vintage from 1908. It's empty. Also inside is a shank made from a sliver of broken glass wrapped in cloth. What an odd combination.
@MechaMage: Try as you might, you are unable to open the safe. You crank at every exposed edge, corner, and crack with your knife, but the safe remains securely shut. This is kind of aggravating. On the subject of rendering objects mentally, though, all of the containers look like ordinary safes, just with different lock mechanisms. Looks like Axis has already taken care of the hardly-closed unsafe.
I take the bottle and the shank. It may not have any whiskey in it, but by gum, where there's a bottle there's gotta be whiskey! I head in to the elevator, inspecting the shank a little closer.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
I am NOT going to see friend requests, so stop sending them.
@Cliff_Racer: Why bother with the other safes, right? They don't contain riches beyond your wildest dreams or all eleven of your late grandfather's missing golden teeth. Of course not. What kind of cowboy would devote his time to following his greatest desires anyway?
Other than all of them, of course. The temptation to return is painfully burdening.
You look closely into the glass knife. You see your reflection in the middle of a lot of dirt and grime. That might just be your reflection, though. You briefly ponder the possibility that you are only the reflection the real you is seeing from inside the glass.
Yikes.
Otherwise, it's just a shiv. Not a magical unicorn shiv that lobs sparkle grenades, not a robotic camouflage shiv that turns into whatever weapon you imagine it is, and not a mailbox-flag shiv taped to a ruler. So... unlike this place.
I put the blank in my revolver, then aim over the mound, trying not to move much, and fire.
being the ninja that he is, he all ready is in a prime sniping location that is...somewhere that you cant seem to find out... as Axis fires David fires one round but the sound isnt quite right it starts out normal but its followed by a long whining sound, the round passer over Axis and in a fit of epicness taking up two days of luck goes down the barrel of the machine gun ripping apart its mechanisms and flying out the other side
"sorry about that Axis"
(first person to guess what the whining noise is from gets an e-cookie]
@Cliff_Racer[-3]: The complex whispers in your ear in a voice reminiscent of a disgruntled mother, "Oh, stop whining, you big baby. It's just a flesh wound. Now get up and shoot them this instant!"
You pull yourself together and chamber your blank in the revolver that actually needs ammo. Why would you shoot this thing, anyway? Not like it will do much. Whatever; you're ready to fight.
@MechaMage: This is going to be great. As soon as the shooting starts, you are absolutely going to unload on those nationalist war-mongers. You check the readiness of your weapon and scope in on the unaware opposition. Now, you wait.
@Killer: What a daydream that was. It'd be pretty awesome if that actually happened. You're sure the complex will reward your awe-inspiring mindset in the short future. Anyway, you keep close watch on the targets inside. Your reticule drifts over them as you pick out your victims. Bang! Pow! Boom! You imagine shooting them before the gunfire actually starts. It was pretty awesome, too.
Something great is going to happen for you, you can feel it.
@AI: Time to get this party started.
@Party: A hideous war cry is let out by the chainsaw-spearman. He rushes inside and alerts the Germans, putting his life in the hands of his well-prepared team.
David takes the first shot, letting fly a single round toward the Nazi machine-gunner. The bullet is taken by the grenade strapped to his belt; it detonates instantly, killing him and wounding the nearby spotters. In its wake, only a mangled heap of a man and two horrified German soldiers remain.
Axis calls out targets over radio for Rodric, who dispatches them with due efficiency. Half of them don't even have time to pick up their guns before receiving a dose of high-velocity lead. When this gets boring, Mr. Cufeti is quick to arms, wielding the revolver that needs no ammunition. He overpowers the pain in his bullet-riddled leg, standing and letting loose a storm of immaterial ammunition.
When one soldier tries to flee the bunker empty-handed, he runs head-on into Axis. Feeling courages, Ol' Wagonwheel takes out his sidearm loaded with only a blank. Dumbfounded, the German can only stand locked in fear. Axis shoots the blank and the German faints at the thought of his imminent death.
That ghost-like thing takes its chances picking up a deadened landmine. He hurls it inside and is content with the resultant scream.
((The next part isn't important for anyone else, so you don't have to read it. It's just a dramatic fight scene as outlined in my personal goals. If someone else wants one of these, just ask.))
Almost no one is left for Matt. One guy thought he could hide under a desk, but was discovered and scared out of hiding by burst of flame from the madman's wrist-mounted weapon. The German scurried out of cover and stood; he reached for his sidearm to find that it was on a table across the room, where he left it in fear. With a burst of courage and no other option, he draws a combat knife. The soldier's smartest move comes first, and he runs toward Matt to close the distance from that freakish polearm. Matt braces the shaft of the weapon between them, and takes the brunt of the German's weight as he tries to push him against the back wall. The Nazi succeeds in pinning back the frenzied fighter, but doesn't have the fighting experience to avoid the knee and kick thrown to escape the hold. The Nazi falls backward onto the floor, and it was luck alone that let him dodge the drop of the chainsaw as Matthew strikes it down onto him. Rolling out of the way, he tries to grab the weapon, but the spinning chains bear into his arm as it is pulled back out of range. He jumps to his feet and returns to hand-to-hand fighting; not giving up the opportunity again, he kicks directly into Matthew's stomach and slices across the aggressor's closest arm with his knife, causing Matt to draw back in pain. The German tries to run forth once again, but Matt raises the chain-lance as he approaches, and it roars painfully across his lower torso. He falls onto the floor in pain, unable to find the strength to stand. Matt takes the pistol from the table across the bunker and pulls the trigger at the German's head... It's empty. Matt throws it into the air and grabs it by the barrel, using the handle as a club to finish the valiant enemy.
[-2 knife, lowered weapon effectiveness]
[-1 kick, no penalty]
((/dramatic fight scene. Probably makes me look greedy. Sorry. Really.))
----------
I invite my allies into the bunker so we can find that elevator.
@Epicphail: The walk uphill is tiring. Not really tiring, but enough that it made you think about it. The bunker's pretty uninteresting at first glance. And second glance. And any subsequent glances taken to verify the conclusions drawn from the original glances. Blar.
@Cliff_Racer[-3]: You shoot off a round into the sky, and chuckle at the thought that it might kill someone way out where. You taunt the corpses of your fallen victims like a true proud cowboy and suddenly become disgruntled at the appalling lack of WHISKEY in their collective possession. What softies; you bet they drank juice as children.
((I realized BBCode was still broken right about here.))
You head on into the broken bunker and are simply taken aback by the amazing triumph you had here. Obviously, level two is a great benchmark for the entire dungeon complex and every progressing level will stay at this low difficulty level. Wonderful. Or yee-haw. Clearly, the mind of the complex doesn't share your old-western spirit.
@MechaMage: Your radio call-out is ignored. Either everyone died or there are no survivors left to care about. You equip your rocket launcher, and the sheer thought of its amazing firepower amplifies your courage (+2 bravery)!
@Party: The bunker is fairly typical. Concrete walls, concrete floor, concrete ceiling. Most of the ceiling is gone, actually, along with part of a wall. The defining feature is a semi-large crater opposite the firing window. It was unmistakably created by a strong kinetic impact with the structure of the bunker... but by what?
Everyone's best guess lies with the undetonated, eerily familiar, 500-pound bomb at the bottom of the crater, but who can be sure?
One thing that's certainly apparent is that you don't see an elevator. There are dead Nazis, tables with strategic maps, squad radios, and two supply crates... but not an elevator. At least there should be some valuables worth taking.
----------
I search the area for any kind of currency. Unbeknownst to my allies until they inevitably read my mind, goods of such monetary value will prove very helpful, nigh essential, in our journey.
"Without any warning or outstanding implication against it, I will proceed to poke the thing in the crater," you quip, "by which I mean specifically mess with its inner workings and, in a wonderfully ironic display, things that make it tick." Your allies will not mourn your passing.
@MechaMage: Your search for hats returns two German combat helmets, a grey grenadier's cap, and an American baseball hat. How'd that get there? This was an amazing success.
Matt is most certainly going to poke the thing in the crater, though.
@Cliff_Racer: Unspent bullets are everywhere; lining bandoliers, filling magazines and boxes... Too bad none of it is the right caliber to fit your revolvers. You load them in, anyway.
Science cannot explain this.
----------
I attempt to arm the bomb in the crater, showing my allies another great example of outside-the-box puzzle-solving before I eventually hand that responsibility over to them.
Ew.
@MechaMage: You approach the nearest exit. The complex is disappointed by your boring action and throws a pen at you. It doesn't really hurt, but it makes you feel bad.
@Cliff_Racer & A.I.: Red wires are connected, locks are unlocked, bolts are unbolted, short circuits are... elongated? Whatever, it's fixed. Whoop de doo. Through the miracle of miracles, this thing is now a ticking time bomb.
You just don't know how much time you gave it!
----------
Uh... Get the heck out of there?
I say, hightailing it out of there.
@Cliff_Racer: Not much important should happen this turn. It's kind of just to build suspense before the underwhelming event that follows. So, sure, why not run?
@AI: That ^.
@Party: The time bomb reaches zero. Soon, you would learn the true nature of its construction. Well, maybe not soon. Maybe recently. Maybe a long time ago. Maybe far in the future. Only time will tell. Heh.
The bomb does not detonate. It floats back up through the ceiling, all of the scattered debris following suit. Axis, Rodric, and Matt casually walk back out of its blast radius in the exact manner they had entered... except startlingly reversed. The crater reforms to the solid foundation it was just minutes earlier. The bunker structure becomes perfectly repaired as broken chunks of concrete move flawlessly back into their original positions. Out of its radius, the involved team members go outside to see the bomb. It drifts upward into the sky as a transport plane flies backward through its path. The two unite, and everyone suddenly understands.
It was a time bomb.
You see the bunker in its original design. In the corner is an elevator. Other items of interest include a safe, a mildly safe, and a completely unsafe. Wait... you don't get it.
"Ooh! Human boxes! This one looks strange..." He says, while attempting to open it.
@Cliff_Racer: It's locked... technically. It's an unsafe because whatever's inside isn't secured safely at all. It is operated by a keypad lock requesting a four-digit sequence of numbers. There is only one key on the board below it, reading "1".
It's kind of funny.
----------
I enter the elevator and resign myself to idleness until my allies are done here.
I punch the '1' key four times.
@MechaMage: Try as you might, you are unable to open the safe. You crank at every exposed edge, corner, and crack with your knife, but the safe remains securely shut. This is kind of aggravating. On the subject of rendering objects mentally, though, all of the containers look like ordinary safes, just with different lock mechanisms. Looks like Axis has already taken care of the hardly-closed unsafe.
Other than all of them, of course. The temptation to return is painfully burdening.
You look closely into the glass knife. You see your reflection in the middle of a lot of dirt and grime. That might just be your reflection, though. You briefly ponder the possibility that you are only the reflection the real you is seeing from inside the glass.
Yikes.
Otherwise, it's just a shiv. Not a magical unicorn shiv that lobs sparkle grenades, not a robotic camouflage shiv that turns into whatever weapon you imagine it is, and not a mailbox-flag shiv taped to a ruler. So... unlike this place.