Hi i created this story tell me on the poll if this is good or not...
THE BOOK OF DIMEISIONS
There once was a boy who had a big imagantion. He lived in San Digeo Calfornia. It was only him and his grandpa. This story is about a boy named Peter. One day his grandpa said” I’m going to the store Peter”.”Okay” said Peter.When he left Peter got curious and went into the attic where he was never allowed to go. He serached around and discovered that his grandpa was an amazing explorer. His father discovered a book of the dimensions. One day he went missing and never found again.”How is that possible?” thought Peter. “He can’t be gone he lives with me.” He then saw a book on the floor that said The Book of Dimensions. He took it got out of the attic and hid the book in his room.
That night he opened the book and all the pages were empty but one. For some reason there was a picture that was moving. At the bottom of the page it said The Skylands Dimensions. He put his hand on the picture and magicly he was teleported to the Skylands. When he got there he saw a tall tower and these weird flying whales. He found a note on the floor. It said” Dear Peter if u found this I built this tower using my brain. I’m being quite serious Peter. You can build anything in this dimension with your head. Love Grandpa” He didn’t believe it. He imagined a red jet and it appeared out of no where. But he tried touching the jet but then he woke up in his bed. He thought it all was a dream but when he opened the book the pictures were still moving. He turned the page and saw a picture of a club. So he then looked at the bottom and it said Dimension Explorers Club. He put his hand on it the picture and off he went. The rest coming soon…
The idea is interesting but you need to flesh it out more. Right now it's a bit bland and lifeless. You need to work on describing things better and giving more detail.
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Little solace comes
to those who grieve
when thoughts keep drifting
as walls keep shifting
and this great blue world of ours
seems a house of leaves
THE BOOK OF DIMEISIONS
There once was a boy who had a big imagantion. He lived in San Digeo Calfornia. It was only him and his grandpa. This story is about a boy named Peter. One day his grandpa said” I’m going to the store Peter”.”Okay” said Peter.When he left Peter got curious and went into the attic where he was never allowed to go. He serached around and discovered that his grandpa was an amazing explorer. His father discovered a book of the dimensions. One day he went missing and never found again.”How is that possible?” thought Peter. “He can’t be gone he lives with me.” He then saw a book on the floor that said The Book of Dimensions. He took it got out of the attic and hid the book in his room.
That night he opened the book and all the pages were empty but one. For some reason there was a picture that was moving. At the bottom of the page it said The Skylands Dimensions. He put his hand on the picture and magicly he was teleported to the Skylands. When he got there he saw a tall tower and these weird flying whales. He found a note on the floor. It said” Dear Peter if u found this I built this tower using my brain. I’m being quite serious Peter. You can build anything in this dimension with your head. Love Grandpa” He didn’t believe it. He imagined a red jet and it appeared out of no where. But he tried touching the jet but then he woke up in his bed. He thought it all was a dream but when he opened the book the pictures were still moving. He turned the page and saw a picture of a club. So he then looked at the bottom and it said Dimension Explorers Club. He put his hand on it the picture and off he went. The rest coming soon…
to those who grieve
when thoughts keep drifting
as walls keep shifting
and this great blue world of ours
seems a house of leaves
moments before the wind.
[12:41] Coffeeeeeee!
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[16:29] "And lo, the tacos were delicious"